Center for Sport, Health and Wellbeing
Experience of loneliness

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Experience of loneliness

Do you know what it feels like to be alone?

In academia, loneliness describes the subjectively perceived discrepancy between desired and actual social relationships—in other words, the subjective feeling of being alone. Loneliness is divided into three categories:

Emotional loneliness (intimate loneliness)
Refers to very close relationships, such as a partner or close friends.

Social loneliness (relational loneliness).
This refers to one’s wider circle of friends and other personal relationships.

Collective loneliness
This refers to the global sense of belonging—or the lack thereof—within society.

Loneliness should be distinguished from social isolation, which refers to the objective state of being alone. Many people enjoy being alone without it causing them emotional distress. Conversely, there are people who feel lonely even though, objectively speaking, they live within a large social network.

When is loneliness bad for your health?

Feeling lonely from time to time is completely normal and not a sign of illness. However, if that feeling of loneliness becomes chronic, it can have a negative impact on your health. There’s no specific threshold to determine when that point is reached, but important warning signs include:

  • Do you avoid contact with others?
  • Do you make excuses to turn down invitations?
  • Do you push others away to protect yourself?
  • Do you act as if you’re under attack?
  • Are you actively seeking out social connections, or have you already resigned yourself to your fate and given up?
  • Do you feel like you’re suffering immensely because of the situation?
Tips
  • Structured daily routine—for example, set your alarm for the same time every day instead of just drifting through the day, and make a plan of what you want to get done today.
  • Stay in touch—use your phone to call or text friends or family again.
  • Make someone happy – When was the last time you sent a postcard or a package? Use this time to bring joy to others—and to yourself.
  • Start a new project—maybe you’ve always wanted to learn a new language or how to knit? There are endless new things to discover that are great ways to keep yourself occupied on your own. Now is the perfect time to do it!
  • Game Night—Get together with your friends to play games. Or join CampusPlus’s game night every Wednesday starting at 6:30 p.m. at Basecamp (Building 36)
  • Campus Activities—browse the university’s website and take part in campus events to meet new people
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  • Blaszcyk, W., Lesener, T., Müller, J., Neben, D., Sprenger, M., Dastan, B., Diering, L.-E., Jochmann, A., Juchem, C., Stammkötter, K., Stauch, M., Wolter, C., & Gusy, B. (2022). How healthy are students at the University of Kaiserslautern? Results of the survey 06/21 (Publication series of the AB Public Health: Prevention and Psychosocial Health Research: No. 04/P21). Berlin: Free University of Berlin.
  • Luhmann, M. & Bücker, S. (2019). Loneliness and social isolation in old age. Accessed on 29.03.2021 at http://www.pml.psy.rub.de/mam/content/abschlussbericht_einsamkeit_im_hohen_alter_onlineversion.pdf.
  • Hawkley, L. C., & Cacioppo, J. T. (2010). Loneliness matters: A theoretical and empirical review of consequences and mechanisms. Annals of Behavioral Medicine, 40(2), 218-227. doi.org/10.1007/s12160-010- 9210-8
  • Peplau, L. A., & Perlman, D. (Eds.). (1982). Loneliness: A sourcebook of current theory, research, and therapy. New York: Wiley Interscience.